Saturday, May 29, 2010

Beware the bitch in Ward G3

I only had one portion of my surgery done at John Hunter Hospital – the lip-wedge extraction.
The whole neck-slitting business will to have wait until after I get a PET scan done from Calvary Mater Hospital (all this is being done back-to-front, for some reason; the two hospitals don't appear to get along and I have to be my own middleman).
Anyhow, last night I was given a "single room", which in reality means four patients curtained off from each other.
Given that one poor old bloke next to me was attached to a nebuliser (basically an air-conditioning unit) and another woman couldn't stop throwing up, I didn't have the best sleep.

Then I was awoken early this morning by a nurse who was affixing a baggie to my drip. I quietly asked her, "What's the time?"
She barked back at me, "Ten to seven", then exited my little cubicle, leaving the curtain parted.
I asked, again quietly and politely, for her to close the curtain, at which point she snapped, "NO, I'm sick of these curtains, they're always getting in my way. I'm always tripping up on them." She then flung them open as far as she could.

The curtains fall at least a foot short of the ground, by the way.

Another nurse came in and when I explained I wanted some privacy, given my mouth had just been sliced up, she took her colleague's side. "What's your problem?" she asked me, somewhat sarcastically. "You look like a supermodel compared to some of the other patients here."
Charming!

I should note all the other nurses were perfectly professional and friendly.
In case you're wondering, the "nurse" with the curtain issues is shortish, stout and looks like a younger Jennifer Saunders in a bad mood.
No other nurse would tell me her name – I respect the sisterhood, but this sour-faced harpy doesn't deserve the position she holds.
She'd make a better parking officer.

The fact I will have to return to the same hospital and spend a week there for a neck bisection fills me with absolute dread.


I'm just glad to be home, even if I am on an all-puree diet.

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